family gathers around the biggest round teak table I could find. This year we are using it every night it doesn't rain or snow!
I feel in that moment a complete sense of contentment.
Its another one of those memories that I welcome every time in crosses my psyche. I linger in the memory. I love that memory, that feeling that all we had in that moment was good, and it was enough.
On Friday we pulled together a pretty impressive impromptu bbq for cousins and the like. It was the close of 'cousin camp' (more on that tomorrow). My parents, sisters, even sister in law Katie and her two California boys were in and out of the house. We had plenty of yummy food. The older boys helped organize, they set up extra tables and did whatever needed doing to make the meal happen. Flowers from our blooming garden were cut to make an outdoor table centerpiece.
Dinner was almost over, after lovely conversation around the table. I went in to get something. I came outside again. As I walked across the yard, a wonderful welcome feeling came over me. A feeling from my memories.
I felt content, completely.
It brought me to tears.
Its not that I haven't felt content ever since we left our Boise home. Its just that the sense of 'enough-ness' is one that I really want to have with me ALL the time. I think it is human nature to see what it is we lack, or to wish for things we want. But I think I have an acute sense of what my life is not, instead of all that it is. So in my prayers and strivings I am trying to improve my perspective, to see all that is in front of me, instead of the one or two things eluding me.
So my gratitude that my soul could come forward and show me that all that we have can bring such a centered feeling of contentedness just caused a tear to fall.
I'm so grateful for the moment in the yard on Friday night; and for all that surrounded it to make it move forward to its rightful place before me; good family, a loving spouse, a home that can welcome loved ones and guest, the beauty of the garden, the satisfaction of a delicious simple meal. The realization that these kinds of things are the treasures this life has to offer. The treasures that bring us that memorable, wonderful, welcome, peaceful feeling that we are content.