A New System...

binders stay on a shelf in our message center, right by the door where the kids leave for school

our awesome tokens can add up quick for the kids; they can earn 7 per week just by doing their daily tasks; and more if they put in a little extra effort!

Even Lucy is excited to do her 'morning tasks'. She earned her first token this morning, and was thrilled to put it into the ziploc duct taped on to the back of her binder

We have used our "clipboard" system for several years now, and it has been losing effectiveness pretty fast-kids weren't getting their checklists finished often enough during the week to earn their allowance at the end of the month. I was losing my temper more and more because they were so apathetic about their responsibilities.

It got especially bad when school began.

I really thought hard about how to shift our focus from the kids being 'slave driven' to the kids becoming independent and productive...a hard paradigm shift for kids to make.

I felt it would take an incentive that was concrete enough to help the kids have a desire to 'buy in' now and then as their good habits form and they become more natural at keeping themselves in order (both physically, spiritually and mentally) then the fruits of being independent become the rewards themselves.

So I 'lifted' my friend Sharon's concept for her kids' summer work, and have made it a part of our every day routine.

Just a couple of SHOUT OUTS. First, THANKS MALIA! For the 'tokens' - Malia is John's administrative assistant and she really double times as our 'family assistant'. She was in charge of the company Summer party, which was "Harry Potter" Themed complete with 'galleons' we used during the amazing event. Malia was so kind and helped us by donating the expired galleons and they have become our family tokens!

another THANKS to SHARON! Your description of the family binders you put together last summer was the seed from which this idea grew for me. I appreciate you as a mom and thanks for showing me what could work for my family by sharing what was working for yours :)

So, Here's how we do it.

1. The kids are expected to take care of some simple tasks each morning before school. these include dressing, eating, making their lunch (even Molly makes her lunch with my supervision), cleaning up their room and making their bed, having a 'quiet minute' to have personal prayer and hopefully personal reading of scripture/spiritual thought, helping straighten up one of our home's common areas (this 'weekly job rotates; kids help with the library, music room, dining room, den and family room) and practice the piano.

I know that seems like a lot each morning; but our kids get up early. we gather the kids at 6:40 a.m. to read scriptures as a family and have prayer before John leaves for work and Mason leaves for school. These early mornings have been our family pattern for over 5 years; and it works for us though I know it seems over the top for many other families...

2. When the kids complete their list of tasks before they leave for school they get a token. Tokens are saved in each child's binder in a ziploc bag.

3. Extra tokens can be earned by giving an extra music practice session, practicing a foreign language, practicing math concepts through Kahn Academy and other various things. Kids also earn a token when they participate in their dinner night without complaining and follow through with those duties from start to finish...and they earn 2 tokens on a Saturday if they complete their jobs "Saturday style" which includes dusting and vacuuming as well as helping with laundry a bit and doing a "Saturday job"...

LOTS of chances to earn tokens.

4. Kids turn in their tokens for various things; namely they turn in the bulk of their tokens in order to claim their monthly allowance. Kids don't have to have earned 100% of their tokens in order to claim allowance, but they do have to earn 85% or better...nobody's perfect but you've got to try, hard.

5. Other 'token love' includes staying up a few extra minutes on a school night, or turn in a few for a treat from 'the stash' (more on how we are handling candy and sugar in our home these days to come). They can let their tokens pile up and even turn in 20 for a late night with their friends...lots of different kinds of incentives/prizes and prizes worth just a couple of tokens to prized/privileges which are worth up to 20.

a couple of 'asides': the Jr. high kid gets a little break on the time; she has until 4 p.m. to complete her task list because she leaves for school only 30 minutes after scriptures and she has piano and guitar to practice. And, we've changed our High Schooler's routine completely-more on that tomorrow!

How do you run your family 'routines'? How do you motivate your kids to work? How do you help them contribute to the family without incentive-ising them into entitlement? I'd love to hear more about what you do in your homes...your ideas and 'systems' could be helpful to others-me included!