
Our entry into school has gone relatively smoothly so far, at least on most days. It has been fun to see our kids tromp home after a long day, actually glad that they can walk home from school (instead of school being held IN their home...) It has also been fun to see the welcome they've received by the school and its staff. All of the kids were greeted by their first names, the teachers and students having been prepared in advance for their arrival.
Porter's kindergarten teacher sent home a weekend project which included Finny the Fish. Finny was to partner with Porter for the weekend, joining us in all our activities. At the end of the weekend Porter (with mom's help) added a scrapbook page to Finny's travel book, and then Porter presented his scrapbook page to all his classmates and told them about his adventures with fish in tow. Fun idea. Kinda hard to come up with activities and adventures that did NOT include unpacking boxes or stacking packing paper in the garage. We managed to bring Finny along to a church activity, and he did get to sleep over with Porter and all of Porter's newly recovered stuffed animals.
But Finny's best and most important adventure with Porter was learning how to empathize with a kid who has to wear an eye patch. Saturday morning, like most every other morning of Porter's life, began with tears as I approached him with his eye patch. This eye patch, while completely necessary to help Porter's weak eye become strong, is a difficult challenge for Porter in his daily life. I think one of the most difficult things I've heard from my sweet little Porter is "I have to go blind now". These are the words he whispers as I apply the daily dose of patch to Porter's strong eye, forcing the weak muscles of his lazy eye to work for themselves.
On this day, with Finny as witness, Porter began his rant and lament concerning optical patch therapy. In my motherly frustration-which surfaces easily when I have to apply something, like a patch, in my children's life which is in the short term very painful but in the long term very beneficial-I wanted to holler out at Porter, "you know we have to do this every day kid, so buck up!" Somehow instead of doing that, I instead said to Porter...
"It must be hard that no one knows what its like for you to have to wear this patch."
"yeah mom, you don't know what its like to go blind" said my pathetic little man.
"but, maybe Finny would understand you if you let him wear a patch today too."
"but, could he know what it feels like?"
"I'm sure he could. He is a fish, and fish are very empathetic. Let's try"
"o.k. mom"
on went Finny's patch. On went Porter's patch. On went a smile (on my face and Porter's) and on went the camera.
I was relieved that for one day Porter felt understood and that we had avoided fits and fighting over something that hurts now but matters a lot later. Porter was just glad that someone could know how it feels to "go blind" for a while every day, and that knowledge helped him smile instead of cry.